 “You were so nice and respectful—it’s so rare to that today” was what people said when Dawna Stone worked her way through challenges and competitions to the winner’s circle on The Apprentice: Martha Stewart. The response of the viewers so surprised her, she decided to write a book.
Building positive relationships, politeness and treating people well, all seem like simple, common-sense advice but, as Stone points out, it’s not always seen that way. “Nice is viewed as a chink in the armor and a guaranteed ticket to finishing last,” Stone says, “[but] Winning Nice can be your ticket to self-fulfillment and happiness.”
With new papers extolling the virtue of kindness and integrity running in recent issues of McKinsey Quarterly and the Harvard Business Review and the success of No Asshole Rule by Robert Sutton, it seems that civility and decency is back. Using her experience as an investment banker, management consultant, magazine publisher and winner of The Apprentice: Martha Stewart, Stone outlines how you can excel at business and still look at yourself in the mirror and your colleagues in the lunch room.
Be “nice” throughout your career
Winning Nice is a book for young women starting out, employees looking to change jobs and managers trying to maximize their team’s output.
For beginners she offers advice on everything from resume writing to interview skills to how to dress for success. For employees looking to make strides in the corporate world—pointing out not only what worked for her but also what she is looking for at promotion time—she gives tips on self-promotion, knowing the client and building networks. And for managers, she offers insight on how to inspire, lead with vision and give back to ensure a balanced life of integrity.
Leading through example
Stone follows her own advice. The book is well researched and pumped full of entertaining stories, illustrating anecdotes and compelling quotes. But, in the most valuable sections, the author draws on her own experiences, successes and stumbles as both an employee and as an employer.
Stone provides her best tips when referencing her early business experience and the launch of her own company—finding mentors to believe in her and proving the rest wrong as well as her victory on The Apprentice: Martha Stewart—overcoming negative relationships and building lasting friendships.
Her award-winning women’s and sports magazine Her Sports + Fitness has clearly given Stone plenty of industry insights to share with anyone looking to start their own company or seeking the confidence to strike out in a new direction.
The first section of the book challenges you to Build Your Foundation as an individual; the second part looks outward to Build Your Future. In each chapter there are lists of relevant tips and reinforcing features such as Ask Dawna, Real World Wisdoms and the Bottom Line, Do it Right, Say it Right.
Stone outlines the benefits of managing nice, building relationships and focusing on the small details—personal notes, follow up calls, and employee recognition—that make a difference. But she also weighs in on difficult situations that can bring out our worst, such as firing employees, getting the most of out your staff—even if they are your friends—and dealing with coworkers or bosses who subscribe to a more cutthroat philosophy.
Proof in the pudding
Stone leads us by being an excellent role model. She gives credit to her mentors and co-workers, and she is clear, specific and positive. You also get the distinct feeling from the personable and light tone that despite her success, she is, in fact, nice.
At times her advice is so straightforward it may seem simplistic, but therein lies part of the message. “Despite living in what many like to characterize as ‘dog-eat-dog-world,’ it is completely possible –in fact easy—to succeed in business and life with your head held high,” says Stone.
It’s simple yet sage advice that begs repeating.
About the Author
Dawna Stone is publisher of Her Sports + Fitness magazine. She has worked as an investment banker, management consultant, company president and senior executive at a publicly traded company. In 2005 Dawna won The Apprentice: Martha Stewart. She lives in St. Petersburg, Florida with co-author and husband Matt Dieder and their two dogs.
Author: Dawna Stone
Publisher: Center Street
Number of pages: 243
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